I’ve spoken to several nurses here in Minnesota since Alex died. All of them are traumatized, and somehow, at the same time, this has stepped up their empathy and love so that they are even more effective in their jobs. It’s crazy how the opposite effects happen like this.
Teri I listened to you on a podcast yesterday. “We must treat all people as human beings.” Listening to you improved me and informed me of greater compassion with a patient today. You are among the great peacemakers and healers. I also learned that restacking these stories is a form of activism. Blessings!
Yes, Michele. restacking is most definitely a form of resistance. The more people who share these stories, the more people see them and the more aware the people outside of Minnesota are about what we have been through and what we are doing here. That’s so important!
thank you for naming me as one of the peacemakers. with the division in the world today, one of the hardest things to do is keep coming back to “all people are humans”
Thank you Lazlo. I wrote this so that people could see what the VA workers in MN are facing through all of this. Alex and Renee did not die for nothing. Their death has woken us Minnesotans up to a deeper form of love and empathy, and my stories are my way of showing that.
Thank you Teri and to Marie and all the VA nurses and staff. Day will come when there is an Alex Pretti Memorial VA Hospital. We work towards that day. Bless you mate.
I am old enough to have a capping ceremony and to graduate in a white nurses uniform with a new cap that has the graduate nurse black velvet ban on it. I held the Nightingale lamp and recited the oath at the capping ceremony. I wept at the end of this essay. I weep for all, but the nurses hurt or killed in the line of duty...
I figured you would probably know about the nurses colorguard ceremony. Have you ever been part of one like this one?
My aunt went through the full Healing Touch and had a pinning ceremony that she said was just like the pinning ceremonies for nurses. Did they change the capping ceremony to a pinning ceremony?
Since I have no idea what a pinning ceremony is, I don't know. Now I will need to look it up. LOL
Now that nurses are no longer wearing caps and are not educated in a hospital setting, it leaves me feeling bereft for what was and is now no more.
We received a school pin right before graduation. Based on what I read thanks to Professor AI... it sounds like it has elevated importance now, especially since there is no capping ceremonies.
Our major capping ceremony was the one at the end of our first year. During our second year we would wear this plain white cap when we were working on the units 3 days a week. At the end of our junior (2nd) year the instructors for our group would place a blue velvet band and a small cross on our caps. This was not as big a deal since it was happening in multiple small cohorts.
This denoted to all and sundry that we were senior student nurse when we were in the hospital. All these small steps reinforced our progress.
Then right before graduation we all received caps with a black band and the school pin was pinned to the collar of our brand spanking new all white uniform. We were then handed a single red rose that would be replaced with a dozen roses when we crossed the stage and received our diploma.
“They killed the helper” carries the weight of the whole excerpt. Marie’s fear is not abstract; it is located in the parking lot, the keys between her fingers, the patient call interrupted, the memorial on a laptop screen, and the terrible recognition that a nurse running toward harm could become the one harmed. The piece honors something essential about caregiving professions: helpers are trained to move toward need, even when the world around them has become unsafe. Thank you, Teri Leigh, for bearing witness to the grief, rage, tenderness, and fierce love women carry when ordinary places become sites of fear.
Incredibly moving piece Teri. You are meant to be the messenger bringing these horrible truths to the world yet in the end add your dash of pixie dust of hope. I’m behind you with love.
The trauma of that day reverberates to this day. I can't imagine how the VA nursing staff still struggles to process it. Just because it isn't on television or in the news anywhere, doesn't mean it isn't on replay in our minds. Thanks for sharing Marie's story.
Marie is a dear friend of mine, and I have held her through this trauma. It hit her and all other nurses really hard. I’ve actually interviewed several nurses through this. They all feel like a part of them died with Alex.
I have a story I have yet to write…about a social worker who worked the ER of the hospital where ICE would take their “victims” after beating them up. That one is gonna be hard to write too.
that’s one way to say it “tore my eyes open”. I really do hope that my writing of these stories helps people to feel the events in their bodies in some way like we have. We are completely changed by all this.
My therapist’s recursive question to me is, “Where in your body do you feel that?” This time, it was mostly my eyes. My nose, too. And my heart, but mostly my eyes. 😿
Such a powerful piece. So sorry for your loss Terri.
thanks for reading Pasqual.
Oh I’m sobbing. Thank you for sharing this.
I hope it is complex tears…of all the feels. not just the pain and grief, but also the love and empathy.
Oh definitely! It is the love ♥️
me too.
So powerful. Vivid, insightful, terrifying loss of innocence. Sharpens my understanding of professional trauma of nursing and fierce love.
I’ve spoken to several nurses here in Minnesota since Alex died. All of them are traumatized, and somehow, at the same time, this has stepped up their empathy and love so that they are even more effective in their jobs. It’s crazy how the opposite effects happen like this.
Teri I listened to you on a podcast yesterday. “We must treat all people as human beings.” Listening to you improved me and informed me of greater compassion with a patient today. You are among the great peacemakers and healers. I also learned that restacking these stories is a form of activism. Blessings!
Yes, Michele. restacking is most definitely a form of resistance. The more people who share these stories, the more people see them and the more aware the people outside of Minnesota are about what we have been through and what we are doing here. That’s so important!
thank you for naming me as one of the peacemakers. with the division in the world today, one of the hardest things to do is keep coming back to “all people are humans”
This is beautifully written. I am so sorry for all that you have gone through! We must never stop fighting for justice for Alex Pretti & Renee Good!
Thank you Lazlo. I wrote this so that people could see what the VA workers in MN are facing through all of this. Alex and Renee did not die for nothing. Their death has woken us Minnesotans up to a deeper form of love and empathy, and my stories are my way of showing that.
Thank you & I agree.
Thank you Teri and to Marie and all the VA nurses and staff. Day will come when there is an Alex Pretti Memorial VA Hospital. We work towards that day. Bless you mate.
I think VA nurses should get some kind of sign that says they all should be greeted with “thank you for your service”.
Amen!
I am old enough to have a capping ceremony and to graduate in a white nurses uniform with a new cap that has the graduate nurse black velvet ban on it. I held the Nightingale lamp and recited the oath at the capping ceremony. I wept at the end of this essay. I weep for all, but the nurses hurt or killed in the line of duty...
I figured you would probably know about the nurses colorguard ceremony. Have you ever been part of one like this one?
My aunt went through the full Healing Touch and had a pinning ceremony that she said was just like the pinning ceremonies for nurses. Did they change the capping ceremony to a pinning ceremony?
Since I have no idea what a pinning ceremony is, I don't know. Now I will need to look it up. LOL
Now that nurses are no longer wearing caps and are not educated in a hospital setting, it leaves me feeling bereft for what was and is now no more.
We received a school pin right before graduation. Based on what I read thanks to Professor AI... it sounds like it has elevated importance now, especially since there is no capping ceremonies.
Our major capping ceremony was the one at the end of our first year. During our second year we would wear this plain white cap when we were working on the units 3 days a week. At the end of our junior (2nd) year the instructors for our group would place a blue velvet band and a small cross on our caps. This was not as big a deal since it was happening in multiple small cohorts.
This denoted to all and sundry that we were senior student nurse when we were in the hospital. All these small steps reinforced our progress.
Then right before graduation we all received caps with a black band and the school pin was pinned to the collar of our brand spanking new all white uniform. We were then handed a single red rose that would be replaced with a dozen roses when we crossed the stage and received our diploma.
“They killed the helper” carries the weight of the whole excerpt. Marie’s fear is not abstract; it is located in the parking lot, the keys between her fingers, the patient call interrupted, the memorial on a laptop screen, and the terrible recognition that a nurse running toward harm could become the one harmed. The piece honors something essential about caregiving professions: helpers are trained to move toward need, even when the world around them has become unsafe. Thank you, Teri Leigh, for bearing witness to the grief, rage, tenderness, and fierce love women carry when ordinary places become sites of fear.
I have hugged Marie many times, and each hug holds so much, and yet never enough.
Incredibly moving piece Teri. You are meant to be the messenger bringing these horrible truths to the world yet in the end add your dash of pixie dust of hope. I’m behind you with love.
I’m doing my best to pixie dust everything I can. I appreciate you for noticing. How’s life on the boat???
The trauma of that day reverberates to this day. I can't imagine how the VA nursing staff still struggles to process it. Just because it isn't on television or in the news anywhere, doesn't mean it isn't on replay in our minds. Thanks for sharing Marie's story.
Marie is a dear friend of mine, and I have held her through this trauma. It hit her and all other nurses really hard. I’ve actually interviewed several nurses through this. They all feel like a part of them died with Alex.
With the VA hospital in such close proximity to the Whipple Building, the nurses were eyewitnesses to the ongoing violence and trauma, too.
I have a story I have yet to write…about a social worker who worked the ER of the hospital where ICE would take their “victims” after beating them up. That one is gonna be hard to write too.
This story tore my eyes open. It is something we need to know not just intellectually, but also physically in our heart and in our spirit. 🫂🙏🏻
that’s one way to say it “tore my eyes open”. I really do hope that my writing of these stories helps people to feel the events in their bodies in some way like we have. We are completely changed by all this.
My therapist’s recursive question to me is, “Where in your body do you feel that?” This time, it was mostly my eyes. My nose, too. And my heart, but mostly my eyes. 😿